apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
