Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
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