My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
time to smoke my breakfast
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
