I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
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