awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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