I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Randomize
