but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
