Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I will be naked everywhere
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
