I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize