Where did you get a picture of my penis
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
