I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Can you bring me the toilet please
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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