that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
