i was rollin on her like bob the builder
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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