I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
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