Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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