i don't like sucking hair
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
