I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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