i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
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