They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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