when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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