wakey wakey hands off snakey
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
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