thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
no. you can't hotbox the world.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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