WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
