i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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