I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
