i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
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