we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
