Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize
