lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
