Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
