whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
