he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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