Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
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