Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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