Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
