There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
