he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
You should frame my arrest warrant.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
