Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize