i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
