She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize