I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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