Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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