I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
