I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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