so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
