How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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