That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
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