All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Randomize
