we're blogging at a bar
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Randomize
