I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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