Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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