no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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